On my way to work on Monday I took a wrong turn. So naturally my GPS redirected my path and before I realized it.
I was there.
The place that took my life away and gained a remarkable new one all in an instant.
1 year and 5 months later.
When it hit me that I was about to be there I knew it was time and there was no turning back.
I have rode by there 3 times but this was the first time I was driving and I was alone.
Never once did I feel what I felt, and it never phased me till Monday.
I saw the railroad tracks and I broke.
I began to see myself : A carefree girl driving, singing loudly, and then BAM.
I saw it.
I saw myself swerve, and flipping.
I saw myself lose that life I once knew.
I was shaking, sobbing, and fear overtook my body.
It was painful and it almost was like it happened all over again.
Crying out, in honestly a broken heart, I felt God take hold of me and this came on the radio.
Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Lord, you never let go of me
I'm not going to sit here and say the pain left my body because it didn't.
Honestly, I cried for 2 hours straight replaying it back in my head.
But what I did know and had full confidence in is that God never let go. Never. He was there the day before, during, and He is right now.
All I can do is trust. I know that although this journey painful still to this day has made me experience things I would not of. Through the moments of desperation God strengthens me, reminding me He endured so much greater and He truly knows. I am trusting God for what is to come.
I know that without Him I wouldn't be here, and that's proof enough He is real and in control.
My God is good, and gives me hope, peace, and joy. For that, I will be forever grateful. Even in the pain and trials.
John 16:33
I have told you these things, so that in Me you will have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world!
